The State Of Marriage

This comes from Dr. Al Mohler's Blog and is very interesting reading.

The U.S. Census Bureau has just reported that cohabitation among heterosexual couples has hit record numbers as living together -- as opposed to getting married -- becomes more and more mainstream.

USA Today provides extensive reporting on this issue, along with analysis that seems to celebrate this development.

In one article, "Census Reports More Unmarried Couples Living Together," the paper provides a summary of the findings. As the paper reports:

The number of opposite-sex couples who live together, less than a million 30 years ago, hit 6.4 million in 2007, show federal data released Monday. Cohabiting couples now make up almost 10% of all opposite-sex U.S. couples, married and unmarried.

That's up from 2006, when the Census bureau reported 5 million unmarried, opposite-sex households. But that figure was based on a question that some respondents might have found unclear.

The important shift is not found between 2006 and 2007, but between 1977 and 2007. Just thirty years ago cohabitation was rare and marriage was the norm for heterosexual couples. All that has seemingly changed.

Nevertheless, the other side of the story was downplayed. If cohabitating couples make up "almost 10%" of heterosexual couples, then marriage is still very much the norm. In fact, the American numbers on marriage are much different than those found in many European nations, where the percentages of unmarried couples living together is much higher. The resilience of marriage is a big part of this story, but that fact doesn't provide much headline fodder.

The paper also suggested that the true figures concerning cohabitation are obscured by the fact that many couples who are currently married had previously cohabitated. One researcher cited by the paper suggested that the American pattern of cohabitation is more of a life stage than a permanent lifestyle.

Sociologist Linda Waite of the University of Chicago "says living together in the USA isn't very stable or long-term, compared to some Scandinavian countries where it's more likely to be a long-term committed relationship." She said that in America cohabitation is "part of the life course." As she explained: "It's something people do that leads to somewhere," she says. "If it doesn't lead to marriage, it leads to splitsville."

USA Today also provided an analysis article, "Living Together No Longer 'Playing House.'" In this article, Sharon Jayson argues that cohabitation has been falsely blamed for later marital problems and breakups. As she introduced her article:

A generation ago, unmarried couples who lived together were often derided for "shacking up" or "playing house." Studies in the 1980s supported those negative stereotypes, suggesting that cohabitation could doom a long-term relationship, substantially raising the risk of divorce.

While researchers say the overall divorce rate is higher among those who lived together before marriage, now they don't blame cohabitating.

As Pamela Smock, a sociologist at the Population Studies Center at the University of Michigan-Ann Arbor, suggested, "There's been a sea change in societal, cultural and individual acceptance of cohabitation."

More from her article:

"The nature of cohabitation has changed," says Jay Teachman, a sociology professor at Western Washington University in Bellingham. "Cohabitators 20 years ago were the rule breakers, the rebels, the risk takers -- the folks who were perhaps not as interested in marriage, and using cohabitation as an alternative to marriage."

"Twenty or 25 years ago, if you were cohabiting and then married them, the marriage was more likely to dissolve and end in divorce," he says. "Today, that's not the case. You can cohabit with your spouse and not experience increased risk of divorce. We're making these finer distinctions that we didn't make before."

In an interesting twist, one researcher argued that cohabitating couples should be seen as "a family form in its own right," as completely distinct from marriage. USA Today rounded out its reporting with a poll. As the paper reported its findings:

Most people today reject the notion that couples who live together before marriage are more likely to get divorced, finds a weekend USA TODAY/Gallup Poll of 1,007 adults.

Almost half (49%) said living together makes divorce less likely; 13% said it makes no difference. Just 31% said living together first makes divorce more likely; 7% had no opinion.

The fascinating aspect of this poll is the very fact that the paper thought that a poll would be valuable. The poll actually reveals nothing about the actual impact of cohabitation on marriage, but only on what people think about the impact of cohabitation.

Once all this is put together, a portrait of a changing America comes into view. The most significant data reveals the incredible cultural shift on cohabitation since the late 1970s. The larger picture concerning marriage would have to include the impact of so-called "no-fault" divorce laws that became widespread during the same period.

Even as marriage is still the norm, increasing numbers of heterosexual couples are cohabitating before, if not instead of, marrying. The Census Bureau reports statistics, but the more urgent dimension of this development is moral. The subversion of marriage comes at great cost, even if couples do not experience what they describe as trauma or trouble. The reality of sexual intimacy outside of marriage always comes with a moral and spiritual cost, but this is rejected by a culture in denial.

For many, cohabitation is now just "part of the life course."

Power of Encouragement

Yesterday, after I wrote a slightly depressing post. I had a friend of mine in the church just call to see how I was doing let me know that he was there for me and was praying for me. This meant the world to me. Then another friend of mine dropped the church office just to talk and pray as well. Amazing how quickly God can work through prayer. But, that made me think. If these two guys taking a little time out of their life to bless made such an impact on me, what would be it be like if we all took a little time out of day to pray for an encourage one another. That sounds like a great idea. But, it is not original with me Heb 3:13 says But encourage each other daily, while it is still called today, so that none of you is hardened by sin's deception.

Notice the writer of Hebrews view a lack of daily encouragement contributing to to us being hardened and tricked by sins deception. How are we tricked by the deception of sin? It tricks us into that no one cares, that we take the easy path, that God can't handle our problems, that life will never get better. It says that these thoughts and sins will harden us. That we may be Christians but we will be hard Christians robbed of joy and hope in Christ. I know people who claim to be Christians who live like this. I wonder if they had people, to love, support, and encourage them, in their life what a difference this would have made. Let's find it is never to late to show and feel the power of encouragement.

May today we practice again what the writer of Hebrews asks of us Heb 10:23-25 Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful; (24) and let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds, (25) not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.

Feeling Encouraged and Refreshed,
Pastor Phillip

Discouraged Pastors

I have been feeling a little discouraged as of late. It happens to all of us from time and preachers are not excused from it. It seems sometimes that Satan is just on your back and pushing you down. I wondered if I was the only preacher who ever felt this way. I came across this today and I was comforted that I am not the only one, but also frightened to see the damage pastoral ministry can have ones life and family

Darrin Patrick, pastor of The Journey in St. Louis, in a recent podcast reported on a recent study by Focus on the Family. He reports the following:

• 1,500 pastors leave the ministry each month due to moral failure, contention in churches, or spiritual burnout.
• 50 percent of pastors will be divorced by the time they leave the ministry.
• 80 percent of pastors and 84 percent of spouses feel discouraged or unqualified in their roles as pastors.
• 50 percent are so discouraged they would leave if they could but have no other way to make a living.
• one out of five seminary and Bible school grads who enter the ministry will leave it in the first five years after graduation.
• 80 percent of spouses feel their spouse is over-worked. 80 percent wish their husbands would leave the ministry.
• 80 percent of pastor’s wives say the most destructive event that ever occurred in their marriage and family was the day they entered ministry.
• 70 percent of pastors fight depression.
• 40 percent have had an extramarital affair since starting ministry.
• 70 percent of pastors say that the only time studying the Word is when they are preparing a sermon.

I ask for your prayers for my family and myself. It as the Apostle Paul said in Eph 6:19 Pray for me also, that I may be given the message when I begin to speak — that I may confidently make known the mystery of the gospel. The fear of failure is strong and the punishment severe. James says in 3:1 Not many should become teachers, my brothers, knowing that we will receive a stricter judgment.

Thank you to all who pray from me and my family and all the encouragement that you give. I will close with the words of the Psalmist 42:5 "Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul? Why are you crying the blues? Fix my eyes on God-- soon I'll be praising again. He puts a smile on my face. He's my God."

Trusting In God, Pastor Phillip

Make Sure Your Loved Ones Are Rapture Ready

The most popular books in our library here at Antioch Baptist Church are the "Left Behind" series. I have never read them, I hear from people all the time how good they are. I disagree with much of the theology behind the fiction, but the focal point of the books is the rapture. Through out the history of the church there have been predictions for hundreds of “imminent raptures” and have thus far failed to materialize (I hope or we have been left behind). The question has always been what happens when the rapture takes Christians from the world before the Great Tribulation, what happens to those who are left behind.

Well, if you are worried about you lost loved ones then this service may be for you. To that end, welcome to the world wide web youvebeenleftbehind.com. This handy-dandy website allows subscribers the opportunity to remind special friends and family members who missed the Rapture that they still have hope, and a chance, to gain the Kingdom of Heaven.

From their website:

“You’ve Been Left Behind gives you one last opportunity to reach your lost family and friends For Christ. Imagine being in the presence of the Lord and hearing all of heaven rejoice over the salvation of your loved ones. It is our prayer that this site makes it happen.”

That’s right friends…for a mere $40 per year subscription fee, youvebeenleftbehind.com will let you store up to 250Mb of documents that can be automatically e-mailed to up to 62 different lost people when the Rapture happens.

But wait, you might be asking, how does this service work? I mean, the Rapture takes all the Christians away, and these folks who run this site are obviously good Christians. How does the system send out all these e-mails to the lost if they’ve (the site hosts) been taken back to Jesus?

Just as Noah got instructions from God on how to build a really big boat, the fine folks at youvebeenleftbehind.com have an ingenious trigger that can only be divinely inspired.

“We have set up a system to send documents by the email, to the addresses you provide, 6 days after the “Rapture” of the Church. This occurs when 3 of our 5 team members scattered around the U.S fail to log in over a 3 day period. Another 3 days are given to fail safe any false triggering of the system.”

Got it? If three of the five team members fail to log in to the system for three days in a row, the trigger is set. Another three days pass, and it’s sure the Rapture took place.

The site is the brainchild of Mark Heard, who came up with the idea while buying stocks online one day. He worried about how his wife would gain access to his account and password if he were to be Raptured at that moment.

“In the encrypted portion of your account you can give them access to your banking, brokerage, hidden valuables and powers of attorneys. There won’t be any bodies, so probate court will take seven years to clear your assets to your next of kin. Seven years, of course, is all the time that will be left (during the Tribulation) so, basically the Government of the Antichrist gets your stuff, unless you make it available in another way.”

I wonder if Mr. Heard’s wife is openly non-Christian or he just has serious doubts. But you know what they say….behind every great man….whatever.

So should you go out and join today in hopes of offering your lost loved ones the chance of salvation after the rapture? Up to you, but I think John was right when he said of Jesus "John 12:37 Even though He had performed so many signs in their presence, they did not believe in Him."

So, tell your friends about Jesus now and don't depend on some website to do it for after your gone. Remember the writer of Hebrews warns "Heb 9:27 And just as it is appointed for people to die once--and after this, judgment." Make sure you and your loved ones are ready?

Pastor Phillip

Go Ahead And Sue God!!!

If you read your Bible it will step on your toes. It will make you uncomfortable, convicted, even mad at all that God expects and demands of us. But, the good part is that we are not left to ourselves in our strength to carry out all that God asks of us. I always try and remember Philippians 2:13 For it is God who is working in you, enabling you both to will and to act for His good purpose. God gives us the grace and the strength needed to carry out what He asks us to do. Always remember that when you are feeling tempted to become discouraged. But, if you are still mad, you can try what this guy did below and sue God. That right! Sue God!

Man sues Bible publisher over verse
DETROIT, MI (NBC) - The Bible and a reference to homosexuals is the focus of a $60 million lawsuit against a west Michigan Christian publisher.

This hand-written lawsuit was filed Monday in federal court in Detroit.

There are a lot of unanswered questions at this point about whether this $60 million suit has a chance of going anywhere.

The suit alleges Grand Rapids-based Zondervan deliberately caused homosexuals to suffer by, what the suit claims, is a misinterpretation of the Bible.

The suit centers on one passage in scripture: first Corinthians, chapter six, verse nine and how it reads in Bibles published by Zondervan.

Bradley Fowler filed the suit. He says Zondervan Bibles published in 1982 and 1987 used the word homosexuals among a list of those who are 'wicked' or 'unrighteous' and won't inherit the kingdom of heaven.

Fowler says his family's pastor used that Zondervan Bible and because of it, his family considered him a sinner.

Now he's suing for $60 million. Bradley Fowler says "to compensate for the past 20 years of emotional duress and mental instability."

Fowler claims the company is misinterpreting the Bible by specifically using the word homosexuals. He admits that every Bible printed is a translation, interpreted in some way, but he says specifically using that word is not a translation but a change.

Fowler says "these are opinions based on the publishers and they are being embedded in the religious structure as a way of life."

The man filing the suit says he came across the discrepancy while researching a book noting, he says, Zondervan Bibles published in the 80s used the word homosexuals but earlier and later ones didn't.

We went to the library to do some research of our own, finding Zondervan Bibles published both in the 80s and post-2000 use the word homosexuals.

And some other Bibles like the New American Standard also use the word.

Others don't. The regular American Standard version uses the phrase 'abusers of themselves with men.' the King James says 'abusers of themselves with mankind.' Still others use the word 'sodomites.'

This just proves the truth of Heb 4:12-13 For the word of God is living and effective and sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating as far as to divide soul, spirit, joints, and marrow; it is a judge of the ideas and thoughts of the heart. (13) No creature is hidden from Him, but all things are naked and exposed to the eyes of Him to whom we must give an account.

May we let God's word reveal our sin and even more importantly as David said in Psa 16:11 You reveal the path of life to me; in Your presence is abundant joy; in Your right hand are eternal pleasures."

Pastor Phillip